Friday, March 25, 2011


By Martin K. Makokha (BTh, MLS)


The eye of the adulterer waiteth for the twilight, saying, No eye shall see me: and disguiseth his face.

In the dark they dig through houses, which they had marked for themselves in the daytime: they know not the light.

For the morning is to them even as the shadow of death: if one know them, they are in the terrors of the shadow of death.”

Word of God in Job 24:15-18.


Being a VCT counselor for several years now, has placed me in a position of listening more and advising clients as far as living faithfully to one partner is concerned. Most often I do find a case where one is unfaithful, due to this or that. This has been reasons why I have decided to give thus issue a critical look and thus this small volume.


A simple Biblical definition of adultery is an act of sex between a married people with another person who is not his wife/husband.
Human beings were created as sexual beings, sex is something that was made by God to be enjoyed by two people who are married, and thus it is a gift only to be enjoyed in marriage. It is not intended for unmarried people. Being married for a couple of years now, I do understand why it is not meant for unmarried people. When enjoyed within God-ordained boundaries its not only proper but also quite satisfying, thrilling and even necessary for stability.


Adultery is one the oldest sins that has been affecting man for a long period. In the Old Testament it was considered one of the great sins that warranted a death penalty.

Long before Moses was borne, God warned a gentile man not to commit adultery with Sara the wife of Abraham, God referred to this gentile man as a dead man if he commits adultery with someone’s wife;

But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night, and said unto him, Behold; thou art but a dead man, for the woman which thou hast taken; for she is a man’s wife.” Genesis 20:3

As early as Abraham’s time, God proclaimed that the penalty for adultery is death! Genesis 20:7, 26:11.

Moreover you shall not lie carnally with your neighbor’s wife, to defile yourself with herLeviticus 18:20 (NKJV)

Anyone found committing adultery was to die by the testimony of two or three witnesses. This shows how God detest it, if a person was found to lie, which is violating the ninth commandment that person was not killed but the one who commits adultery, which is the seventh commandment was killed!!

The man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death.” Leviticus 20:10 (NKJV).


Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; He who does so destroys his own soulProverbs 6:32 (NKJV).

If there is one sin that has brought down mighty men of God, then it is adultery. Personally I have a number of close friends who used to be powerful ministers if the word, but they were brought down by a single act of adultery.

David a man after God’s own heart was no exemption to this, he was brought down by adultery when he slept with Uriah’s wife. Look at the outcome, he killed Uriah and what followed The revolt from his own son Absalom and the shameful act when Absalom slept with his fathers mistress in the open! All because of a single act of adultery!!

I have never seen anyone who has involved himself/herself in adultery escaping a punishment. One might think that he is secure and can just commit it without people knowing but soon or latter the bitter outcome will emerge.

In recent years (2010) one of the great golfers of our time Tiger Woods was brought down by the same act of adultery. Though he was a well established man, with a beautiful wife, a successful career in golf, with a lot of many from corporate world. The bitter bite of his actions came out and what followed? His wife divorced him, his career was greatly damaged, and he lost billions of dollars that he got from advertisement with each company disassociating it from him. When he appeared after a few weeks underground, all he could manage to do was to shed tears in front of cameras as he beg for forgiveness. Indeed adultery has brought down champions.

Job describes this act in the following words;

If my heart went after another man’s wife, or if I was waiting secretly at my neighbour’s door; Then let my wife give pleasure to another man and let others make use of her body. For that would be a crime; it would be an act for which punishment would be measured out by the judges: It would be a fire burning even to destruction, and taking away all my produceJob 31:9-12 (Bible in Basic English)

Can you imagine the strength and the power of words that Job use?

Proverbs indicates that an adulteress house is a deep path towards death! Proverbs 2:16-19.


Some people claim that the Ten Commandments were done away with when Jesus came. But when we read in Matthew 5:17, 18, we understand that Jesus didn’t come to abolish the laws but he came to fulfill them.

In which way did he fulfill the seventh commandment, let’s read in Matthew 5:28,

 But I say unto you. That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” 

 Remember the commandment as given by God was just simple, “Do not commit adultery.” Period!! But now Jesus is fulfilling it by saying “anyone who looks at a woman and desires (lust) after her in his heart he has committed adultery.” That’s quite strict! You might wonder why is Jesus that strict?

To explain this let me illustrate the account of King David.
And it came to pass in an evening tide, that David arose from off his bed, and walked upon the roof of the king’s house: and from the roof he saw a woman washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon. And David sent and inquired after the woman. And one said, Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite and David sent messengers, and took her, and she came unto him, and he lay with her; for she was purified from her uncleanness: and she returned unto her house.”-
2 Samuel 11:2-4.

Where did all these started?? The EYES, “HE SAW A WOMAN” King David saw a woman, then from seeing he desired the woman with his heart because she was beautiful! Remember Jesus didn’t said, “Anyone who see a woman has committed adultery,” for in that case then all of us should have been blind. Jesus said, “That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her.”  To lust is also a sin; it’s against the tenth commandment.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house, though shalt not covet they neighbor’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass. Nor any thing that is thy neighbor’s.” Exodus 20:17.

Job concurs with what Jesus said concerning the eye, by revealing his secret in fighting against this sin of adultery. He says;

I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maidJob 31:1.


All sins that are omitted by men are upon their flesh save the sin of adultery. Our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit and one commits adultery that person uses his body to do the act thus defiling the temple of the Lord.

Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are.”- 1 Corinthians 3:16, 17

Adultery is one of the sins that has been rebuked before, during and after God gave the Ten Commandments; it has been rebuked in Jesus time, apostle’s time and post apostles time.


Wherefore I say unto you, all manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men.”
Matthew 12:31. 

Many people have termed adultery as the unforgivable sin stated in Matthew. All available commentaries agree on this verse that, blasphemy against the Holy Spirit is denying the power of the Holy Spirit and associating the deeds of the Holy Spirit with the devils!! This is the unpardonable sin.

Many have pulled themselves out of the faith, while others have been excommunicated because they were found implicated in adultery. Though as said earlier adultery is the only sin that man does upon his own flesh, but this is not the unforgivable sin.

When the word adultery is mentioned we usually think of married people only. But the Bible brings another picture of adultery that is common in our world today, especially in the western countries.

If a husband divorces his wife and marries another woman or vice versa, then they are committing adultery at it’s best!!

Biblical doctrine is that a divorcee is not free to remarry another person; if she/he does then they are living in adultery. If this divorcee wants to remarry let him/her reunite with the former partner. The only way out that free this person is if the other partner has died; remember marriage vows should last till death.

So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.Romans 7:3. (KJV) also Matthew 19:9.

This form of adultery is well explained in the life of the Samaritan woman of John 4:17-19, when this woman said that she has no husband, Jesus didn’t rebuked her. He told her that she has said well! Why the woman was leaving a life of divorce and remarriage, she had done that five times;

For you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; in that you spoke truly.” John 4:18 (NKJV)

How can Jesus say that the woman was staying with a man who was not her husband? It just because she was leaving as a divorcee!! Thus even if one is divorced he/she is not free to remarry unless he/she reconcile with the former partner.


As said earlier I have a few experiences as a counselor and I do have one on one talk with my clients and most of the reasons that I get for some of them to engage in this act are as follows:
  • For Women:
ü      Monetary gain.
ü      My husband also does it.
  • For Men:
ü      Notion that a real man should have multiple partners.
ü      When the wife is unavailable.


This is a trick that is used by Satan and his people to deceive people that everyone is doing it. A good number of researches that have been carried out shows that almost 80% of married men commit adultery.

Often we do hear people saying, “That is how men are” whenever one is found in adultery. Who said that me are like that Let it be known that this is a trick of the devil! There are millions and millions of men out there who are faithful to their wives. If you have decided to commit adultery then know that you are at it alone! Not every man is doing it. If one pastor, evangelist, bishop, deacon etc was found committing adultery, please that is him and not all men of God!! It’s common to hear people say, “this days pastors are doing it,” How many do you know?? If you know of one or two, then talk of them not generalize all because of the two, such hypothesis can not be accepted in any scientific research.

Am yet to find anyone who engages in this act and can proudly proclaim that he is comfortable and happy. All that I have come across usually seek help to come out of it! This clearly shows that this is not the way, their must be a clear and non regrettable way of dealing with marital problems without engaging in adultery. In fact committing adultery due to marital problems is a cowardly act.

Let’s take an example of a woman who commits adultery so as to get daily needs as her husband has refused to provide the basic needs. How long will this woman engage in this act, as long as she lives!! Thus becoming a slave to adultery. What if such a woman engages herself in a positive way of doing business, like selling vegetables? First her business will have God’s blessings because it’s a genuine one and her pride as a woman will not be watered down.

Remember that when God created you, He created you with some dignity that you should not just let it down as cheap as that. You are in the likeness and image of God! Why can’t you take a standard in that likeness to God and believe in yourself just like God believe in you and move on with proud. Even if you get great amount of money from adultery, I can assure you that amount will not help you! It only risks your life.

For men, who said that you can not survive with one wife?? The Bible is the Word of God and it says that you can! It proves that God created you to enjoy your life with your wife not other men’s wives! Who in the world said that satisfaction comes from other people wives? You want to know who said that? It’s the DEVIL!!